Everyone knows that the most important thing about Christian dating is that you don’t have sex.* So here are some great ideas to help you get to know each other without “getting to know each other”.

Go on Dates with Your Dad

Nothing says “respect and honour” like dating with your dad around. Going to the movies? Bring dad, dads love movies. Going out to dinner? Take your dad, dads eat food. Going to a romantic lookout where you might want to make out? Take your dad, stick him in the back seat, dads also enjoy lookouts, and he’ll look out you for you two, too.

Have a Snailmail Date

Everyone loves getting mail. Write letters to your love interest and send them in the mail. They’ll read your letter and write you a reply. It’s like having Messenger if your partner is on Mars. It’s super cute and requires you to be no-where near your significant other. You’ll be safe from touching each other and other bad stuff.

Have Netflix and No Chill at Your Local Apple Store

Apple let you use their computers for free plus they have pretty good internet. So head into an Apple store together, bring up your favourite Christian movie and enjoy it together in an appropriate amount of privacy.

Serve Together at Your Local Homeless Shelter

People who are homeless love nothing more than helping young Christians find their life partner. They will feel so honoured if you choose to use a chance to help them as an opportunity to date your sweetheart. They’ll feel great that you’re helping them, and you’ll feel great that you’re helping them instead of falling into sin. Everyone wins.

Don’t Date Until Marriage

Obviously, the safest way to avoid sleeping together is to not know each other. See if your parents would be willing to arrange a marriage for you, you can meet your new husband or wife at the wedding ceremony. You’ll be sure to have an excellent marriage because you saved sex for marriage. Nothing could be better!

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So there you go folks, five great Christian dates for chastity and fun.

*I hope you’ve figured out by this stage that I’m joking. However, I suspect some of you may be worried about what point I am making. At risk of explaining the satire, I hold the view that it’s best to save sex for marriage, I believe that’s what the Bible teaches – I believe it so much I got married as a 31-year-old virgin. I just think we put too much emphasis on avoiding sex in dating as if that’s the only thing that matters. And then by implication, we load people down with guilt if they have had sex before marriage when in no way is it the be-all-and-end-all of Christian dating. Christian dating should be about learning to love, respect, honour and serve each other physically, spiritually, emotionally and all the other ways too. If marriage is about modeling Christ’s love for the Church, then dating should be learning how to do that too. That’s the kind of dating we should be teaching to Christians who want to date – not just dating to not have sex, that’s selling everyone short.